Fetish Revolution – Part 2

Saturday, February 9th, 2013 was the day I had spent the previous three days in anticipating, the day of our full band performance at Fetish Revolution. I woke up feeling relaxed and confident that everything would go well. I also woke up a little drunk from the night before. That didn’t concern me. That I knew I could handle that. I also knew that it would be temporary. I made myself some coffee and got to work on my blog. This was actually the first opportunity on the tour where I had an extended period of time to sit down and really write. Venus and Jazz took off to get food and hit the music store. I stayed back to write.

After the coffee was gone I dipped back into the beer. I think Jazz was a little concerned when he got back to the hotel room and saw me with a beer in my hand. I’m sure I would be concerned if the tables were turned. But I was fine, just a little self-medication to stave off the nerves and keep me focused. I finished my blog, took a shower, shaved, painted my nails, did my make-up, got in costume and packed up my gear. This is all the stuff I do for every show; no big deal.

We arrived to the venue, 910 Live in Tempe, at 5 pm to pickup to the drum set which was being delivered. Big thanks to Patti for helping us out here. We wouldn’t be performing until 10 that night and even sound check wouldn’t happen for a couple more hours. None of this is a complaint. This is just the way it goes. If you really want to know what the rock-n-roll lifestyle is all about; it’s a whole lot of hurry up and wait! So, with the alcohol finally dissipated from by bloodstream and nothing to do the nerves kicked it.

There is always something to be nervous about before a show. Will we have a crowd? Will all the equipment work? Will the sound be good? Will I be able to hear myself and my band-mates? And the biggest one of all, will I choke and forget what I’m playing? All of these thoughts went through my head but the one thing I never thought I would have to worry about in Phoenix was the weather. The main stage was outside and it was getting mighty cold out. Obviously, not as cold as Minneapolis but it was colder than what I had planned for. I probably would have brought a different outfit had I known I was going to be playing outdoors in February.

We spent most of our time standing by the fire.

We spent most of our time standing by the fire

Sound check went great and the promoter wanted to buy me a drink. As we were standing at the bar chatting and enjoying our cocktails a gorgeous woman stopped by to say “hi” to James.  After she left he turns to me and says, “Yeah, she’s beautiful but she’s a bit much for me.” I was perplexed  What in damnation could someone who produces fetish events consider “too much”. Apparently she is into yoga, has placenta in her freezer and is into holistic love. I guess we all have our limits! I found this pretty funny though. I went on to tell him about how into yoga I am and how at one time I too had placenta in my freezer. Upon reflection I do think the later is kind of weird but whatever. I don’t know what holistic love is but it sounded like something I might be into.

After performing, these two kids came up to me to tell me how much they enjoyed the show. They were both really drunk but they were having fun. I thanked them and gave each a big hug. Then they started asking me why I was dressed they way I was. Clearly they were out of their element and probably had no idea what they had got themselves into. One guy said to me “You’re not gay are you?  I know you’re not gay”. I’m always a little unsure how to answer those questions. There is not really a simple answer. I could tell that he was hoping I would say “no”. I’m sure that would have made him more comfortable but it wasn’t going to happen. It’s pretty obvious that I am gay. Still, unless you want to fuck me it’s really none of your business what my sexual orientation is. Even then, the only question should be, do I want to fuck you? In the end I just said, “I could be, some people are gay you know.” Perhaps not the answer they wanted but it took the focus off something that was of no consequence to them and put it back where it belonged, on what a fucking amazing rock band we are. But don’t take my word for it, here’s a video from the show

Speaking of great bands, the headliner of the night was Assemblage 23. These guys are legends in the Industrial scene; super nice guys too. We had to stick around to see them play.

Assemblage 23 at Fetish Revolution 2013

Assemblage 23 at Fetish Revolution 2013

Oh, and I totally have a new crush. DJ Con is such an absolute sweetie. I feel like he is my long lost twin separated at birth, well… um… 16 years apart. His birthday is actually the day after mine. Aquarians unite!

Battle of the bulges. Photo by: Angel Collins

Battle of the bulges. Photo by Angel Collins

Back at the hotel I was finally able to remove the boots I had been wearing for the past 9 hours. Fuck, what a relief that was! My feet had been killing me.   What I hadn’t been aware of because my feet were hurting so much was how much pain the rest of my body was in. Upon releasing my feet from their silver patent leather bondage, sensation returned to every other part of my body and it was not a pleasant sensation. Luckily, there was still beer in the fridge and half a bottle of whiskey. Jazz and I stayed up for a few more hours talking but he offered no help in drinking the booze. I was on my own for that.

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Fetish Revolution – Part 1

The drive to Phoenix felt like a breeze compared to the past couple of days. And breeze may not be the appropriate term. At times we were dealing with gale force winds, perhaps stronger than any winds I have experienced before. Upon reflection, Mother Nature may have provided the most intense experiences of the past 24 hours. She certainly provided the most beautiful. Our decent from northern Arizona to Scottsdale took us through the Tonto National Forest. It was an amazing drive and I wish I had better pictures but here is one.

Tonto National Forest

Tonto National Forest

Along the way we stopped in this small mountain town to get gas. I guess it does cross my mind what people think of us when they see this band of motley looking characters get of a black-on-black tiger-striped vehicle. I’m sure it’s quite a sight to be seen but to me it can’t compare with what they see all around them every day. Jazz mentioned that they will be talking about us for months. I don’t know if that is actually true but it does make me feel a bit jealous.  It takes so much to shock me these days.

The event this weekend is the type of thing that would shock most people. I did arrive with expectations of the most lasciviousness nature, and with good reason. The last time we performed at one of these shows things got so out of hand at the after party that we can never return to that hotel again. It’s not complete bravado that persuaded me to take the pill of Cialis which I had been hanging onto for the past four months.

I clearly had sex on my mind last night but I don’t know how to make those things happen. I’m not a player. I’m no Casanova. I would like to believe that I know how to seize an opportunity when it arises but I’m not even sure that is the case. I did learn that the hotel has a complimentary happy hour so I wasn’t going to pass that up. We let Venus go on to the venue without us and Jazz and I headed down to the pool for a couple Tequila Sunrises.

Venus at Martini Ranch for  Fetish Revolution

Venus at Martini Ranch for Fetish Revolution

Venus performed a solo-acoustic set last night. I’ve played in her band for the past 6 years but I have been a fan for the last 15 years. Since I’m usually on stage with her it is a real treat to get to be in the audience and a great reminder of why I do this in the first place. Venus is a truly remarkable performer and way ahead of her time. I don’t even think the numerous trans-gender people in the audience were not aware of what they were experiencing. I fear that Venus will not be fully appreciated until long after she has given up performing. But I will know that I was there, that I was part of it.While I have the opportunity, I want to do everything in my power to share the magic she creates with anyone who is open to receive it. I’m so grateful that James Bound, co-founder of Horns and Halos, producer of this event, is one of those people who gets it.

I don’t even know how to describe one of these fetish events. It’s such a bizarre clustering of people. I like diverse crowds and if you are into people watching this is certainly a candy store for the eyes. But I don’t really care what people look like. I want to know who they are. I want to get into their head… and sometimes into their pants. Most of the people at this event weren’t even wearing pants. And the fact that this is basically a costume party adds another level of difficulty to figuring out who is who.

People attend these events for so many reasons. Some come for the fantasy, a chance to be someone different. Some come for the music, mostly industrial and goth. Some come for the fashion; some just to look and some to be looked at. Some come because this is one place where they can feel totally normal and some come to have an experience completely out of the ordinary. There is every kind of kink and proclivity, sexual orientation and gender identity represented. I’m fine with all of that. All I want to know is which one of these beautiful human beings wants to have sex with me.

I did meet many amazing people. I met a man dressed as a pirate who was able to pull off the hook hand and peg leg for real. I met a woman covered in scares from consensual but not self-inflicted knife wounds. She was not impressed with the bite mark on my chest. I met a wonderful lesbian couple and we had a great conversation but I had to cut it short because this obviously wasn’t going to lead where I wanted my night to take me. I met half-naked poll dancers who were lovely to look at but not available for conversation. I met a woman laying on her back, next to a bowl of strawberries and covered in chocolate sauce and whipped cream. I asked if I could dip my strawberry in the chocolate sauce on her chest. She said I could but I needed to put the strawberry in my mouth. I obliged, getting the gooey mess all over my beard. I think it was at that point that I realized that I needed to abandon all hope of getting laid and find another way to have fun.

As much as I enjoy having sex I think I equally enjoy dancing. I sometimes forget this. Being an entertainer and spending most of my time in clubs on stage, I forget how much fun it is to just dance. So I headed for the dance floor, not needing a partner, not caring who was watching, just going to move my body and feel the music. It seemed like the DJs were playing music just for me. Either that or they were trying to wind down the night because the music shifted from hard industrial and electro to a songs that I actually knew. It began with Rob Zombie but then shifted to David Bowie and The Cure. Micheal Fanti practically cleared the dance floor but a lone, completely out of place, hippy chic remained to dance with me. After that, Jazz and Venus joined me and the three of us danced together until it was time to leave.

We grabbed up the equipment and headed for the car.  Back at the hotel we all cracked open a few beers and the Black Velvet I had bought earlier. Venus is a Scotch drinker so I tried to tell her it was imported Scotch; imported from Canada. It’s actually pretty tasty stuff for cheap whiskey. We all got pretty sloppy drunk and it turned into one big narcissistic love fest. We started watching old videos of past performances, each of us only watching are own performance and sharing with each other how great we think we are. But we did come to the realization that we are a really amazing band and that we do work incredibly well together. Also, we are more than just a band, we are a family and as fucked up as we are, we need each other. Whatever happens with the IRS, even if they are able to dissolve the business and in effect, the band, the three of us are going to stick together and keep making music no matter what.

So I may not have been able to meet my objective of having sex last night but I had one other goal that I was not going to let go unmet. I was determined to go skinny-dipping in the hotel pool! The pool was right outside our hotel room door. I was shitfaced drunk. It was four o’clock in there morning and nothing was going to stop me. I stripped naked, wrapped a towel around my waist and headed for the pool. One quick dip and I was ready to call it a night. That’s were my memories end. Thankfully, that was also the end of the night’s activities.

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